did you know that you can make the smallest, even the tiniest true feeling from my heart surface? it's as easy as a snap of your fingers. you made me learn how to face my worries and troubles slowly, but truthfully. i cant bring myself to hide anything in front of you. hiding things away from you seemed silly, for the very fact that because i want you to know more about me.
did you know i spent such a long time persuading myself to accept a new relationship? we know that the last relationship ended because it didnt work out. and the question that ponders in everyone's heart is "will this one work out, different from the last one?" you made me want to try something again, without questioning the future nor the ending, for the very fact that i know you're worth it.
did you know that i sometimes wished that you were by my side no matter how positive or negative im feeling? there's nothing better than having you with me and experiencing all the feelings and events that i've gone through. but i know that you will learn and grow in another environment which benefits you more and i should not be too selfish to tie you by my side, for the very fact that i know you need your own freedom too.
did you know all the fears i have inside me? the fear of all the temptings that you will face in the outside world, the fear of not worthy of you, the fear of not finding me as good as you think, the fear of i cant fill the happiness inside you, the fear of you feeling too controlled. all these fears made me paranoid that caused the internal conflict in myself. but i tried to push all the thoughts behind me, for the very fact that i know 'trust' is a very important value and factor that makes a relationship goes on.
sometimes, i rather you be more chauvinistic but who still love me for who i am, so that i know that i have a place in your heart. tonight, i know more about you, how you felt all these while. because you've told me all these showed your willingness in sharing with me the deepest of your heart. im still learning the best way to communicate and overcoming all the obstacles and rocks that stood in my way to get to you. please be patient. i might take a long time to do so, but do believe that im putting in effort.
we both know what is important in an relationship. mutual respect, trust, and most important, love. i thank god for showing you to me. take care my dear. (:
-pEiShi-
