im kinda like sick and tired of things right now. i think things around me is happening too fast. TOO FAST TOO FURIOUS. okay. i've still can joke around, so it doesnt seemed that bad. but it doesnt matter.

i dunno why these few days when i look at this entry typing page, my mind practically went blank. probably like what laura said, it's hard to put feelings down into words. i have limited vocab you know? (: okay. i dun really feel like smiling, so shant put anymore smiley face already. and more than one person said that i looked and feel depressed during this period of time. hmm. i thought i hid it quite well. i really thought i did. 原来心情是不能隐藏的。

i lost my ez-link card today. first time in my life. i almost lost it the other day. forgot to zip my wallet and it dropped out. was on the way to kemb to meet ep vols for dinner. did i said i skipped ep last sat anyway? thats beside the point. okay. and this nice uncle picked it up for me when i was looking furiously inside my bag, blaming myself for the carelessness. yet today, or rather yesterday, i really lost it. maybe it's meant to be. or is it that i didnt treasure it after the first time it's almost lost? i dunno. SIGH.

met up with mh after school. went to jurong and meet her. took bus to bp and i dropped the card. i've got this bad feeling that it wouldnt be back. ARH. i'm kind of overwhemled by the things happened these few months. feel like crying now. PPFFT.

went cafe cartel for dinner. had teriyaki pasta. dun really like it. i wanna go those real pasta restuarant that only sell pasta and nothing else. or maybe drinks.

went body shop and bought my $18.90 toner, called SBS to check for my ez-link card and went back home.

for now i wouldnt say my life is bad or what. but more of i'm tired of handling things and i need a break. things are not what i expected and i have to deal with it as it comes. there is no security that i look for in things. i have the urge to be nun some days ago. the quiet and solemn monastery. i'm fine with endless project works. all the powerpoint, research papers, interviews and many more. but the hiccups that come along the way. TSK TSK. thanks for so much. thinking back, i have been sleeping like at 2 almost everynight. those that are not, i slept at 1. whats the big diff? anyway, im just kidding about the nun part.

mum just changed the metal door. or rather, she asked the contractor to change it lar. and it look so different now. instead of more safe, it seemed to me that it is more vulnerable than what we last had. i missed my old door.

and sometimes i wonder i update my blog for the sake of myself or for others.

-pEiShi-
这个无力感还会持续多久呢？

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